


Beautiful and Blue

by JenniM777



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, F/M, Grieving, Heartbroken Lance, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Past Character Death, Pining Keith (Voltron), klangst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-18 19:48:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29374095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JenniM777/pseuds/JenniM777
Summary: Lance has been spiraling out of control and hurting since Allura died. Keith is there for him and holds the pieces together for Lance when he can't do it for himself.
Relationships: Keith/Lance working towards a relationship, Lance/Allura past relationship
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	Beautiful and Blue

**Author's Note:**

> This is something a lot different than what I usually write. I try to stick to the fluff and mushy stuff but this has been stuck in my head for literally almost two years when I first heard the song "Ocean" by Lady A formerly Lady Antebellum. It's a haunting song that is only backed by piano, but the pain in the words and melody just kept gnawing at me.   
> I had an original draft for this written out about a year ago but it never worked out so I scrapped it. About three months ago I heard this song again and put it on repeat and began writing. This isn't a long story but I hope I conveyed all the hurt and emotional turmoil with just a few words. This went through many many many re-writes before this outcome. If you can I urge you to put the song on repeat as you read this because it pulls the mood together.
> 
> Also, on a side note, I know there is controversy with the band and their name. I'm not here for any criticism for my choice of song by them. Any rude comments about it will be deleted. This idea was born from this song long before the controversy and I really don't want any comments about it to take away from the story itself.

_No I'm not afraid to drown,_

_Take me out take me down_

_I'm so tired of the shore_

_Let me in baby you're an ocean_

_Beautiful and Blue_

_I wanna swim in you_

Keith watches from a distance. Lance stands at the edge of the water, his pants rolled up to mid-shin as he stares over the surf. The air smells of rain and there’s a static charge as lightening zips through the dark clouds overhead. Keith lets out a sigh and pushes back the urge to grab Lance and pull him away from the water. It’s been months and every day is the same. Lance will come to the edge of the beach and wait for the first of the stars to peak through the night sky and offer up some silent prayer to a girl who will never hear him. But today, this night the two of them are standing on the edge of a precipice and they are both about to break.

  
Lightening cracks and crackles in the sky and large drops of rain begin to fall. Keith shoves his hands in his pockets and walks the short distance through the now wet sand and stands next to Lance. He doesn’t watch the storm or the waves that grow more violent as the storm gets closer, instead he stares at Lance. He looks at the way Lance’s eyes are no longer a bright blue but dull and dark like the incoming storm. He stares at the downward turn of lips that no longer know how to smile, the small triangles that cover his cheeks and pulse with a broken heartbeat.

  
Keith reaches for Lance’s hand to bring him back to the shelter of Lance’s family home, but tonight Lance pulls his hand away and shakes his head, “No.”

  
Keith is taken aback by Lance’s voice, so raspy and broken as if it hadn’t been used in months. Which, now that Keith thinks about it, he hasn’t heard Lance speak since…well, since Allura left them.

  
He doesn’t argue with Lance. Instead he resigns himself to wait out the storm next to Lance so he offers a small nod, “Okay.”

  
Keith takes Lance’s hand again and this time Lance doesn’t pull away. Keith is selfish and he knows he is. He knows that Lance is hurting, that his heart has been broken, but Keith takes advantage of these moments when Lance allows the small touches that are being offered. So Keith continues. He’ll press lips to Lance’s forehead, he will wipe the tears from Lance’s cheeks with soft strokes of his thumb, and he’ll wrap an arm around shoulders as they shake with suppressed sobs. 

  
Keith knows he selfish to offer these small comforts to Lance when he only wants to feel for himself that Lance is still alive unlike the lost princess that drifted into the unknown depths of the universe and took the life from the once vibrant boy standing next to Keith.

  
The sky lights up once, twice, maybe four or five times in quick succession as the thunder booms and rattles through Keith’s chest. In that moment Lance turns to him and grips Keith’s wet shirt. If Keith hadn’t shifted to catch Lance against his chest he would have never heard the raspy whisper, “Make me forget. Please, just make me forget.”

Keith places a hand on the mop of soggy brown curls in front of him. His shoulders sag and he feels his own helplessness settle in his chest. His own voice cracks knowing he can’t, “Lance…”

  
Keith is suddenly caught by blue, blue, eyes boring deep into his own indigo eyes. Lance is begging and the sounds that come from his lips are breaking Keith’s heart even more than if Lance were laying prone at his feet with no life left in him. He feels the press of lips and it takes every inch of restraint not to respond because god how he wants to pull Lance into his arms and devour each kiss he offers, to run his hands along the broad expanse of shoulders, but instead he pulls away and fights against everything in him at Lance’s insistent attempt to kiss him senseless.

  
“Please Keith. I see the way you look at me.”

  
He places his hands on either side of Lance’s face, cupping his cheeks as gently as he can and thumbing away what could either be endless drops of rain or tears. His voice breaks and it takes everything he has when he tells Lance, “Not like this. I won’t do it like this.”

  
Lance’s fists twist the shirt in his hands and he pulls Keith closer, “I know you want it. I know you try to hide it but I see how you look at me. All you have to do is just…..please Keith….please….I just need to forget for one night.”

  
Keith feels the churning of his chest like the crashing of the waves from the storm, “I can’t. No matter how much I..”

  
Lance’s shoulders begin to shake and his words come out broken between sobs, “Are you saying you don’t want me?”

  
Keith sighs and pushes wet bangs from Lance’s forehead and presses his lips there, “You know I do. You’ve said it yourself that you see how I look at you.”

  
“Then why?”

  
Keith’s restraint is slowly slipping and he has to take several deep breaths to keep from giving into the warmth in his arms, “Because it’s not right. If I do this, if we do this it would destroy us and I can’t lose you like that.”

  
Lance releases his grip from Keith’s shirt and tries to slide his hands under the wet fabric to touch the skin underneath, “You won’t lose me. We’re not like that, not you and me.”

  
Keith grabs Lance’s hands and holds them against his chest to stop them from wandering along his body that’s starting to feel overheated at what Lance is asking of him, “You don’t know that.”

  
There’s another flash of lightening and a loud crack of thunder as the rain continues to come down in sheets of cold and the waves crash closer and closer to the shore where they are. Keith can feel Lance starting to break, he feels the shift as his words become more desperate looking for anything to ease his pain. If Keith were a lesser man he would let Lance drown him with his body, let the waves pull him under as he allowed himself to come apart with every touch of Lance’s hands. But he won’t let the ocean of turmoil tear them apart. 

  
Lance’s knees buckled and Keith sinks to the cold wet sand with him as he bangs his fists against Keith’s chest, “You won’t lose me. I need you to believe me, please Keith. Just believe me. You won’t lose me, just don’t leave me like she did and you won’t lose me.”

  
Keith wrapped his arms around Lance as his shaking increased and his voice was lost to the never ending sobs, “I won’t leave you. I’m here Lance, I won’t leave you.”

  
Months of pain and hurt, all the heartbreak and suffering that Lance had held in finally broke through just as the storm around them seemed to finally come to an end. Keith just held on to him as he cried out all of his hurt. 

  
Hours later, Keith faced Lance as the two of them stretched out in a small twin bed, windows open as the sounds of the nearby ocean filtered in through the early morning. Soft pinks and yellows of an early morning sunset cast Lance in a soft glow and even with his red rimmed eyes, swollen from crying he was still the most beautiful person Keith had ever seen and always would be. 

  
His voice hiccupped softly when he finally met Keith’s eyes, “I’m sorry.”

  
From the corner of his eye Keith caught the soft twitch of Lance’s fingers and wrapped their pinkies together, “You have nothing to apologize for.”

  
Their voices mingled together as they softly whispered through the events of the past few hours, “It was wrong of me to do that to you. To use your feelings against you like that.”

  
When Keith didn’t respond Lance closed his eyes, “I really am sorry. You shouldn’t have to babysit me when I’m a broken mess who tried to manipulate you.”

  
This time Keith let out a soft sigh and tugged Lance closer. He wrapped his arms around Lance and let his fingers brush through the still damp hair. Keith’s voice was a raspy whisper tinged with the edges of sleep hovering close, “You’re not broken Lance. You’re just lost in a raging ocean and I’m always going to swim out and risk the current to find you.”

  
Lance’s own voice was starting to slur with the need for sleep, “You shouldn’t have to drown with me.”

  
Just before sleep pulled them both under Keith let out a soft breath, “I’m not afraid of drowning in your ocean.”


End file.
